Kenyans have mastered the art of setting up committees, we form committees for anything and everything from Weddings, Funerals, school fees, travelling abroad to medical costs.
Out of all the above, all others are valid except two. Weddings and Travelling abroad. The later has since reduced as the US has since become very strict on issuing visas to those seeking green cards and the IRS will not issue work permits to students.
That leaves us with the worst and most emotionally torturous type which has continued to disregard any manner of decency.
While it is o.k to involve your close friends and relatives in preparation for your wedding, most Kenyans have mis-interpreted this kind gesture that friends will offer of ‘Helping you organise your wedding’.
There is a saying among men,
Weddings are for the bride and her relatives, the groom just foots the bill.
It is no secret that weddings are a women affair. We plan every detail right from the theme, the colours, playlist, suppliers and venues. Sometimes we also hint strongly on where to be taken for honeymoon though that’s the only detail the man is usually left to handle, apart from the rings that is. Women start planning for their dream wedding from the time they are girls barely in their teens and getting the man willing to walk down the aisle just completes plan.
It is this obsession with having ‘The Perfect Dream Wedding‘ that is making most couples extort money from their friends in the name of wedding committees. I have, on several occasions, heard from my friends, relatives and colleagues of how they were included this a certain wedding committee, of a relative, a friend or even someone they haven’t seen in 10 years.
My friend Mwende shared with me her harrowing experience with an old friend she hadn’t seen in over 10 years. The friend, out of the blue, just called, informed her she was getting married and that Mwende had been included in the list of those who were to contribute 10K each. Mwende, in dis-belief informed her, she didn’t have that kind of money but could try get whatever she could to help her. On the wedding day, the husband to be calls her asking,
Are you still contributing to our wedding?
It has now become acceptable for a couple to budget for a wedding that will cost Half a Million (Ksh. 500,000) yet their own contribution is only 100K. They will be bold enough to give you the breakdown of the expenses as well as what each committee member is supposed to raise to make the couple’s wedding a success.
If you thought they were joking, wait until they start calling you every day, sending you email, sms and whatsapp reminders regarding your contribution.
Why not start saving at 12 years or at least take a bank/sacco loan to finance your own
damn wedding if the thought of going to the AGs on a Friday afternoon and only spending 2K is beneath you.