Adoption has been on the cards for me ever since I found out as a child that there are kids out there who are ‘mother-less’. I’ve actively romanticized the whole idea of taking in children and loving them when no one else will. I feel it’s my duty as a citizen of this world to take care of the next generation and blood ties don’t mean much to me.
I’ve had conversations about my adoption plan over the years. First with my cousins as they called me weird for wanting to raise other people’s children. Then my friends in school who wondered out loud why these kids’ parents had them if they weren’t ready to take care of them, this in juxtaposition to the fact that 90% of them are anti abortion and don’t think celibacy is a realistic option for themselves. Also, my boyfriends over the years, some of whom I dumped because they were completely against the idea, others said they wouldn’t take HIV positive orphans if we were to adopt children together. Only one (hey, Brian *waves*) was more excited than I was about the idea of adoption. He even went as far as to find a street child we could take in as a start.
As I have been going through blogs and media articles about adoption in Kenya though, I have come to find that I know next to nothing about the process, the problems, the joys, the politics, the babies, the teenagers, the reactions by friends and family once presented with an actual child not a hypothetical, probable, ‘maybe when I get married and settle down’ situation. I’ve realized that had I begun the process before finding not just the answers, but first knowing what questions to ask, I would have given up in a huff after a few months of frustration, or gone through with it only to stumble through what’s a completely different parenting experience, not pre
I was glad when my amazing editor asked me to write about adoption in readiness for November’s edition of #AfroTalks Reading extensively on the subject has brought to mind some important questions you and I should ask, and find answers for.
- Why do I want to adopt?
- What kind of home will I create for my child?
- Why is my partner averse to adoption?
- How will my family react to the adoption and how will that affect my child?
- How will I make sure the stigma doesn’t break my child?
- How hard is it really to adopt a child?
- How soon do I want to tell my child that they’re adopted?
The November edition of #AfroTalks will be on Child adoption with Kellie Gatwiri Murungi, who’s an adoptive parent and has written a lot on the subject and Wanjiru Kihusa the founder of Still A Mum Kenya speaking on the topic. The twitter chat will be on Wednesday the 25th from 2-5pm and shall seek to answer these and more questions. Join us even as we mark Child Adoption month.
This is part of a series of our #AfroTalks topic of the month of November which is on Child Adoption as November is Child Adoption month.