#AfroTalks online conversation discusses Vasectomy as a form of contraceptive

Vasectomy - All juice no seeds
Vasectomy explained in simple terms
Vasectomy explained in simple terms

Contraceptives. All I knew about them growing up is that they’d make me fat. I was already a big girl and although comfortable with my size (rare for a teenager) I wasn’t sure my knees and ankles could cope with getting bigger. I didn’t know what to do about it and almost always left the question of protection to my partners.

(READ: The Ugly Truth About Contraceptives And Women)

I remember asking baby daddy, who I already knew didn’t want kids, what he’d do if I ever got pregnant. He said,

“We’ll chuck it.”

And that was that. I was completely prepared for a backstreet abortion in a seedy Eastlands clinic when my period disappeared, and then I wasn’t. I look at my son today and remark on how things have changed since that Thursday afternoon, holed up with two PTs in my grandmother’s loo, staring blankly at the white washed walls, wondering if I was going to name the baby after my my dad or his (I was sure it was a boy).

Two years and I will not let a man near me before I sit him down and discuss thoroughly what options we should take vis a vis family planning methods. Sometimes, when it’s just a casual fling, they’ll look at me and I see it dawn in their eyes that I may want something long term they’re not ready for. Then I have to explain that, no, I don’t, I’m just not sure I’d want to have their baby. After a few got insulted by this I tried to turn it around by asking instead what I asked the father of my child, “What would you do if I got pregnant?” You’d think I’d know not to poke a lion, because after Kanye’s line

“18 years, 18 years
She got one of your kids, got you for 18 years
I know somebody paying child support for one of his kids
His baby mamma car and crib is bigger than his”

In Gold digger (feat Jamie Foxx) guys are a tad too paranoid to talk realistically about the possibility of pregnancy without freaking out.

Who are you in the relationship? Are you the scared, naive teenager that knows only the basic negatives of oral contraceptives? Are you the commitment-phobe that thinks everyone is out to entrap you with an unplanned pregnancy? Can you spell depo provera? Do you know e-pills should only be taken in emergencies at most thrice a year? What are the possible side effects of the copper coil? Why did they discontinue norplant implants in some countries?

How informed are you about the way contraceptives affect your partner’s health? Would you consider vasectomy as a means of actively taking part in your family planning endeavors?

AfroMum asked these and more questions on contraceptives on the 30th of September during a social media conversation dubbed #AfroTalks, seeking to learn whether people have adequate, accurate knowledge on contraceptives and who really takes responsibility for reproductive choices in different kinds of sexual relationships.

Dr. Charles Ochieng a medical practitioner and the director of WISPIVA a Kenyan organisation that champions and provides Vasectomy procedure and support, was the invited expert to share his thoughts on not just contraceptives generally but also on the many misconceptions a lot of people have regarding vasectomy.

https://twitter.com/Tichaade/status/649199386359009280

At the end of the 3 hour talk that started from 2pm till 5pm, it was evident that a lot of men still don’t see the discussion on  contraceptives as one they should be a part of. It was also notable that although women feel that the responsibility of deciding what form of contraceptive to use should be a shared responsibility, this was more of an ideal than the reality in most relationship.

#AfroTalks is a monthly social media discussion that happens every last Wednesday of the month. It will run again on 28th of October 2015

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